Just how far is that really?

I have been feeling like I'm in a total state of forgetfulness when it comes to taking time out of my day for God. I hate it when I get like this. I long to stay on a permanent spiritual high, but I just haven't been able to maintain that. Nobody does. I have just started back praying on a daily basis. I have to say there was a pretty big gap between then and now. I have also been battling with feeling saved or not depending on where I am spiritually. It scares me that Jesus could come back any time and I don't want to be caught in a rut. I just want my thoughts and my actions to be pleasing to God. I have to remember that I don't have to be perfect all of the time or any of the time for that matter. I have to remind myself of the awesomeness of God's grace. I condemn myself because I feel so guilty that I'm not where I need to be. Why do I forget about God's grace so much and tell myself how bad I've been? The answer has to be Satan. He knows just how to make me feel weak and not good enough. He creeps in slowly and grabs me when I'm not paying attention.
Oh, how I despise him!

Sorry to ramble, but lately I've just been thinking about how precious life is and I just want to live my life every day without taking for granted the really important things. Those are just some of the things I'm having trouble with right now. I just needed to confess. Please keep me in your prayers as I pray for all of you each night--my friends whom I am blessed to have in my life.

I heard this song on the radio the other day for the first time and it really spoke to my heart. It reminds us that our sins really are forgiven. It's so hard for me to believe sometimes. Please read the words and really listen to them in the video posted above this post.

Thank you God for casting my sin as far as the east is from the west..........(Psalm 103:12)


East to West
By: Casting Crowns

Here I am Lord,
And I'm drowning
In your sea of forgetfulness
The chains of yesterday surround me
I yearn for peace and rest
I don’t want to end up where you found me
And it echoes in my mind,
Keeps me awake tonight

I know you cast my sin as far as the east is from the west
And I stand before you now as,
As though I've never sinned
But today I feel like I'm just one mistake away
From you leaving me this way

Jesus can you show me
Just how far the east is from the west
Cause I can't bear to see the man I've been
Rising up in me again
In the arms of your mercy I find rest,
Cause you know just how far the East is from the West
From one scarred hand to the other.


I start the day the war begins
Endless reminding of my sin
And time and time again your truth is drowned out
By the storm I'm in
Today I feel like I'm just one mistake away,
From you leaving me this way


Jesus can you show me,
Just how far the East is from the West
Cause I can't bear to see the man I've been
Rising up in me again
In the arms of your mercy I find rest
'cause you know
Just how far the East is from the West
From one scarred hand to the other.


I know you've washed me white,
Turned my darkness into light
I need your peace to get me through,
To get me through this night
Can’t live by what I feel
But by the Truth your work reveals,
I'm not holding on to you
But you're holding on to me,
You’re holding on to me

Jesus you know
Just how far the East is from the West
I don't have to see the man I've been,
Come rising up in me again
In the arms of your mercy I find rest
'cause you know just how far the East is form the West,
From one scarred hand to the other.

Just how far
The east is from the west


From one scarred hand to the other